As someone with a mood disorder, I recognize it when I see the anger in someone else. Also, the changeable moods of someone around me who is short-tempered, swearing and then crying, lets me know that I am dealing with someone struggling with a challenge that is not being addressed publicly.
We recognize symptoms, voice, tone, inflection, facial and body movements. We may be depressed but we are actually pretty astute. For me, researching and reading is part of how I process my diagnosis. Also, the hypervigilance to make sure I am not getting worse, means I pay attention to E V E R Y T H I N G !
I know more than many people and can definitely keep up in any technical conversation with a doctor, psychiatrist or therapist. Learning is learning for me; what makes up my depression, triggers, brain function and chemistry, comfort, reactions to medications, others’ experiences are all part of the things that I read about. I own many books and would never think of getting rid of them.
Of course, there are plenty of people who don’t want to face it or hear about it from me. They would like me to experience my panic attacks and anxiety in silence.
Do you like to research and read about your diagnosis or would you prefer to create a clear, untried path to understanding?